A hundred and sixty hilarious jokes that you can choose to read in an instant or spread throughout the year by reading one every two-and-an-eighth days. But if for whatever reason, you can't remember any of these, you can always rely on ol' faithful: "I'm hungryyyyy!" "Hi hungry, I'm Dad.And truly, we’ve gathered only the best knock-knock jokes there are, and it’s only a hundred and sixty that made it to the final cut. You are now well-equipped to tickle your family pink with the most cheesy, knee-slapping dad jokes just in time for Father's Day. Icing who? Icing so loudly so everyone can hear meeeee! Honeybee who? Honeybee a dear and open the door, please. Ice cream who? Ice cream so people can hear me! A little old lady who? Wow, I didn't know you could yodel! Annie who? Annie thing you can do, I can do better! Abe Lincoln who? Aw, come on, don't you know who Abe Lincoln is? Witch who? Witch one of you will give me some Halloween candy? Wooden shoe who? Wooden shoe like to know. Candice who? Candice door open, or am I stuck out here? I hear they're going to give him a really tough sentence. The world tongue-twister champion just got arrested.My daughter yelled, "Daaaaad, you haven't listened to a word I've said!" What a strange way to start a conversation with me.I'm reading a book about anti-gravity.What do snails become when they die? Escarghosts.I have a pen that can write underwater.What did 50Cent do when he got hungry? 58.I just found out that "Aaaargh" is not a real word.My neighbors listen to really good music… whether they like it or not.What do you call a sad fish? A frownder.How does Darth Vader like his toast? On the dark side.What do you call a fake noodle? An impasta.How many tickles does it take to make an octopus laugh? Ten tickles.What did one ocean say to the other ocean? Nothing, they just waved.What time did the man go to the dentist? Tooth hurt-y.The best way to communicate with a fish is to drop them a line.I ordered a chicken and an egg online.The LEGO shop reopens tomorrow, but I recommend avoiding it for the time being.How do you make a Kleenex dance? Put a little boogie in it!.What did the pirate say on his 80th birthday? Aye Matey!.Why did the melons get married? Because they cantaloupe.Where do lizards go to fix their fallen tails? The retail shop.What sound does a sleeping T-Rex make? A dino-snore.What's the difference between a hippo and a Zippo? A hippo is really heavy, and a Zippo is a little lighter.Did you hear about the ATM that got addicted to money? It suffered from withdrawals.What does a zombie vegetarian eat? GRAAAAIIIIIINNNNSSS!.The fattest knight at King Arthur's round table was Sir Cumference.When a dad drives past a graveyard: Did you know that's a popular cemetery? Yep, people are just dying to get in there!.What do you call someone with no body and no nose? Nobody knows.Did you know the first French fries weren't actually cooked in France? They were cooked in grease.Why did the balloons run away from the concert? They were playing pop music!.What did the artery say to the muscle? You're being a little vein.You got something to say? Let's taco 'bout it!.But I mist my chance, so I guess I could dew it tomorrow! I wanted to take pictures of the fog this morning.My wife refuses to go to the beach with me.How did the picture end up in jail? It was framed!.Why can't you hear the pterodactyl go to the toilet? Because the 'p' is silent.So, without further ado, this article is an ode to the dad joke: all sixty of our favorites just in time for Father's Day. This might be something we need in these rough and tumble times of 2020. Or perhaps it's the sparkle in dad's eye when he knows he's about to get super cheesy?įor many, the memories and the ability to spread some laughter makes bearing witness to these terribly silly jokes worth it. Maybe it's the fact that dad jokes are short, corny, and relatively harmless that makes them so lovable. There is something about dad jokes that foster a weird mixture of satisfaction with a dash of annoyance.
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